COUNTRY'S QUIETEST TOWN

THIS TOWN IS AS QUIET AS A MOUSE

Dusty's Digest | September 2013

Silver Creek is a probably a place you've never heard, or heard of, seeing as it is remote, tiny, and the self proclaimed 'Quietest town in Canada'. Their claim to fame, the lack of noise, was put into place about a decade ago when the Town Council passed a noise bylaw, essentially adding a curfew on loud noises. Since that time six additional amendments have been added making this the strictest noise bylaw in the land.
This is not such a bad thing most residents say. They enjoy their quiet. Many claim the lack of 'noise pollution' has made them healthier and less prone to everything from colds to cancer. There has not been a study conducted to confirm this claim, but, ask anyone living in Silver Creek and they will confirm it.
With this broad support, the newly elected Council Chair Eve Adams, has put forth a proposal to further restrict noise. Her proposal is massive in scale and cost in relation to the village's small size and some have argued it may even be unlawful. Even with these doubts her P&Q (Peace and Quiet) plan has passed the first round of voting with an 8 to 1 majority. First order of business is to put up signs on the edge of town.
As you drive into this picturesque village you will see the "Silver Creek Welcomes You!" sign, and right below that a sign listing certain vehicles that are not allowed to enter the town due to the sound restrictions. It is an extensive listing containing such things as Motor Cycles, ATVs, Snow Mobiles, Vehicles containing 'sub woofers', Riding Lawn Mowers, Tractor Trailers, Hover Craft, even Vehicles with Sirens. Council Chair Adams has sketched out a plan to build a roundabout road that will circumvent the town to allow these offending vehicles to continue down the highway and avoid the streets of Silver Creek.
All bells, from the church tower right down to the bells on the children's bicycles will be disabled. Whistles of all varieties, including the local hockey referee's, will no longer be blown. The upcoming Great Big Sea concert has been relocated to a neighboring town. There is even a request for a study into the feasibility of year round slipper wearing. In addition all resident's must install mufflers on their lawn mowers and refrain from using loud equipment such as chainsaws and jackhammers.
The only section of her proposal that is not receiving massive support is the plan to run a laser light show on Canada Day in place of the traditional fireworks display.
One outspoken critic, the owner of a local ice cream truck, has filed a complaint on the grounds that this bill will devastate the local economy, citing his business as the prime example. His house is currently for sale and he plans on leaving the community in search of a noise friendly city that will allow him the right to tingle his bells to sell his ice cream.
But, by and large, the people of Silver Creek like their peace and quiet and will most likely allow this plan to go through without a peep.